Monday, January 08, 2018
I'm My Own Best Friend?
By: Donovan Baldwin
I sometimes get "inspiration" for these few words as thoughts come tumbling from a fumbling mind, by reading through some of the comments on social media feeds, such as at LinkedIn.
A few days ago, I saw one from Denise W.
It started off, "I'm literally my own best friend..."
It goes on with some tongue-in-cheek remarks in that vein.
Her little post got me to thinking, though, about how much we SHOULD be our own best friend, yet sometimes we become our worst critic, or, even our own worst enemy.
I wonder why that happens?
You would think that we would be talking to ourselves as we would to a best friend. We should be encouraging and praising and advising ourselves as we would someone we cared deeply about.
I don't really think it's so much that we DON'T care about ourselves, our feelings, hopes, and dreams.
I think, just musing here, that we hear so much "No", and "You can't do that...", that we expect someone's supposed to say it. So, instead of looking for reasons why we can, should, ought to, whatever; love, dance, smile, succeed...we listen for the expected voice that tells us we can't...just because we expect it to be there.
Surely there's someone somewhere who would tell us to sing, to dance, to be happy, to risk a kiss.
If they aren't handy, maybe we need to step up, be our own best friend, and say some good and happy words to ourselves.
A few days ago, I saw one from Denise W.
It started off, "I'm literally my own best friend..."
It goes on with some tongue-in-cheek remarks in that vein.
Her little post got me to thinking, though, about how much we SHOULD be our own best friend, yet sometimes we become our worst critic, or, even our own worst enemy.
I wonder why that happens?
You would think that we would be talking to ourselves as we would to a best friend. We should be encouraging and praising and advising ourselves as we would someone we cared deeply about.
I don't really think it's so much that we DON'T care about ourselves, our feelings, hopes, and dreams.
I think, just musing here, that we hear so much "No", and "You can't do that...", that we expect someone's supposed to say it. So, instead of looking for reasons why we can, should, ought to, whatever; love, dance, smile, succeed...we listen for the expected voice that tells us we can't...just because we expect it to be there.
Surely there's someone somewhere who would tell us to sing, to dance, to be happy, to risk a kiss.
If they aren't handy, maybe we need to step up, be our own best friend, and say some good and happy words to ourselves.
Labels: be your own best friend, best friend, donovan baldwin, encouragement, happy, social media
Sunday, September 24, 2017
You're Your Own Best Friend
By: Donovan Baldwin
I wonder sometimes why people have so little respect for their own opinions, knowledge, and insight.
There is such a huge interest in "self help" and motivational books these days...and for decades.
People, seeking "answers", or, even, "the answer", will read book after book seeking truth, only to nod or shake their head in agreement or disagreement...and then go off and do what they want to...maybe even wanted to, from the start.
A lot of times, people, not you and me, of course...those "other" people, will start with a belief, and search until they find justification for their opinion. Once an "expert" is found who can back us up, we feel so much better about our choice to do or be whatever it was we wanted to be or do in the first place.
Actually, most of us have good sense, we just don't use it...or, maybe just don't trust it.
I've had friends and family come to me wanting help, or advice, on deciding which course of action they should choose.
My basic, "go-to", response?
What would YOU tell your child, your Mom, your Dad, your spouse, partner, best friend, to do?
Usually, if they give it a try, they come up with acceptable answers.
Most people won't treat themselves as if they are a "best friend", or, as if they have the "smarts" to give good counsel.
But, I think maybe they are wrong.
Right?
There is such a huge interest in "self help" and motivational books these days...and for decades.
People, seeking "answers", or, even, "the answer", will read book after book seeking truth, only to nod or shake their head in agreement or disagreement...and then go off and do what they want to...maybe even wanted to, from the start.
A lot of times, people, not you and me, of course...those "other" people, will start with a belief, and search until they find justification for their opinion. Once an "expert" is found who can back us up, we feel so much better about our choice to do or be whatever it was we wanted to be or do in the first place.
Actually, most of us have good sense, we just don't use it...or, maybe just don't trust it.
I've had friends and family come to me wanting help, or advice, on deciding which course of action they should choose.
My basic, "go-to", response?
What would YOU tell your child, your Mom, your Dad, your spouse, partner, best friend, to do?
Usually, if they give it a try, they come up with acceptable answers.
Most people won't treat themselves as if they are a "best friend", or, as if they have the "smarts" to give good counsel.
But, I think maybe they are wrong.
Right?
Labels: advice, best friend, donovan baldwin, friends, giving advice, life lesson, self help
